I've been toying around with this post for quite some time now. I have held off because it shows a side of me I'm not so proud of. I decided to write it today because especially lately, more than usual, I've seen comments and posts here and there from bloggers about their home not measuring up...not being as beautiful as the next...not as
perfect.
This big bloggy world is one that has brought much joy to my life.
Much creativity. I have loved "meeting" all of you because of blogging.
But there are times when I click through some blogs and am not proud of my reaction. First, it's awe and glee from a great reveal or project.
Then, maybe a bit of wishing.
Then, do I dare say it...
Resentment? Jealousy?
I'm not proud of that. Not one bit, but it's the truth.
Let me be clear here -- I
big fat LOVE our home. I would not trade it for any other. Because it is
truly where our heart is. I have put my blood, sweat and tears into this house. We have raised out kids here and have created so many wonderful traditions and memories.
I cannot stress enough how much I adore it.So maybe it's not the homes I see that give me the tinges of jealousy. Maybe it's the time some have to dedicate to their homes. Maybe it's the money some can spend on their homes. Maybe it's the way they describe their lives that seem so...
perfect?
Maybe you have felt that way about this blog at times? I know it's possible and probably true, but I hope it's a fleeting feeling.
Our home is not perfect. Our life is not perfect. And a couple weeks ago, I got a big (soft) slap upside the head from God when I found out something about a blogger I visit every so often. It's a little known fact about this person, and let's just say I felt like a big fat ARSE after finding out the information. ;)
It was a message in flashing red lights that no one's life is "perfect." It may appear to be, but it never is.
And really, who wants perfect? Seriously, perfect is
BOR-RING. Just like a house, it's so much more interesting with imperfections...the squeak on the floor that drives you crazy every time you step on that spot. The crack in the wall no one sees but you (but it still drives you mad). The dings in the drywall and baseboards from kids
living in a home. All of us have squeaks and cracks and dings in our lives that make them not perfect.
I will spare you the details of my life, but because of my experiences, HOME means so much more to me than a building or a place for stuff. Most of my childhood was filled with wonderful memories and traditions. I never noticed the dings in the drywall, the creaks in the floors. (And your kids won't either.)
Then in high school, a series of events occurred that changed my outlook on life. I didn't have a home for quite some time. I lived with my best friend and her family for a summer. When it was time to go back to college, my dorm room was my only home. And that Thanksgiving was spent in an old, gross motel room, just my Mom and me.
It was one of the lowest days of my life.
At that time, Sarah McLachlan's song "
Elsewhere" brought me comfort. I listened to it
constantly. Part of the chorus from that song that still sticks with me:
I believe this is heaven to no one else but me.
And I'll defend it as long as I can be...
That song still makes me cry. ;) I am thankful for every moment of my life, because it's brought me where I am today.
It's not about the stuff or the house being perfect. It's about it being a home, in the emotional sense. Because of my past, a place to put down roots and to create memories for our kids means
so much to me. So if you ever take anything away from this blog, it's that your home should be YOUR haven. I don't care what it looks like. I don't care if it's your dream home.
Make it your dream home with what you have.Even if that is just baking cookies, carving a pumpkin and playing with your kids on this Halloween weekend. Remember even those that feel they have very little are envied by someone. Be proud and love what you have and make it what you love and are proud of, in whatever way you can.
I hope you have a wonderful holiday weekend with your family. Thanks for listening to my deep thoughts today. :)
I'm so stinking excited you all love my redo as much as I do!! It's GORG, eh? It just feels like "home" to me, like it always should have looked this way. ;)
The gumball machine was $4 at Goodwill and I couldn't. resist. it. I tried, I did. It's perfect for peanut M&M's. Makes it a bit harder to get to them, which is a good thing. ;)
This year I got a few more little jars for $.25 each at GW, and printed off itty bitty labels I found here. (You have to see all of the ideas Lorie finds -- amazing!! I couldn't find the actual post for these -- do you know where it is Lorie?)
Years ago I found images online, printed them out and cut out the shapes in stiff felt. They've lasted for a long time and I love how they look on our windows:
When you take three cardboard letters that spell out BOO and half off scrapbook paper, this is what you get:
Four bucks total, I believe?
I think the paper cost more than the pumpkin for this one:
Outside, I used spidey web lights I found at the drug store last year on clearance (drug stores have some fun stuff for CHEAP after the holidays.) I think these cost me two bucks:
And of course my dollar store tombstones are all over the front yard! I touched them up with white paint and they look awesome:
This one was probably the most expensive project -- I found these vinyl stickers at HomeGoods a few weeks ago and got Spooky and Scary for $6:
I took some scrap wood, spray painted it, distressed it and drilled holes for the ribbon to hang it:
Adorable. Cheap. Thankyouverymuch. ("Scary" is vertical and leans against a wall in our foyer.)
Fun stuff eh?? 
I couldn't resist, really. Could you? (Don't tell me if you could.)
Well, its not completely done, but I thought I would stop the torture and just show you already!! :)
The bench I will show you more of soon. It's drivin' me batty! Argh!! It's going to be gorgeous when I get it just right. (Dad is to the rescue this week -- I'll explain more later.)
The hutch redo I showed you here, and now I love that I can see what's inside:
The window redo I showed you here. I added molding, bamboo roman shades and made my new drapes:
Joann Etc. is STILL out of my trim to finish off the two head chairs. (Pout.) I was thisclose to driving 45 minutes today to get it from another store, but I held back. Have I mentioned I'm insanely impatient?
Aren't they adorable?!
I used scrap fabrics from the chairs and I adore them.
The centerpiece is one of my favorite parts of the room, and it all started with a $4 mirror. You can see the how-to here.
Everything works so great with my cedar chest I redid months ago:
I showed you how 
Reason #7,839 I love my husband -- when I put the fabric on the chairs to show him what it would look like, I asked, do you think it's too much? His response -- "Maybe for some people, but not for us." LURVE that man.
The light. THE LIGHT I LOVE!! It was a knock of a Pottery Barn light I showed you here.
My version is from Home Depot and cost about $100 less (plus free shipping!).
I need to lower it just a couple inches, but for now, it's just fine. :) 
I'm not lyin' when I tell you I've had the chandy turned on every. single. evening, whether or not we're downstairs. I don't turn it off till we go to bed. It's so lovely to look at when we come down the stairs throughout the evening:
And because I'm a sucker for a good before and after, here's how the room looked years ago:
And last year...
Today:
